Deciding ‘ What is not for me ‘ is a choice of Character

It is not uncommon for each of us to have a list of wants – a ‘this is for me’ list , that reflects our desires, ambitions, and greed too ;some of which we may or may not achieve eventually. We so obsessively let this ‘for me’ list rule us , as if a representative statement on us —  as if We are what we Want ; which makes us oblivious to what is equally important list to define of  ‘what is not for me’.

Intrinsic to setting a framework for our conduct and defining our playground – is defining its boundaries( thus far & no beyond ) . If we start playing , without knowing boundary or the rules we will play with, we are most likely to go astray and out of control, and anarchy will prevail if everyone behaves similarly . It is about defining a threshold, which no matter what happens, we will not cross- like defining our ‘Lakshman Rekha’.

Our chances of excelling are obviously higher when we know what our limits than when we don’t .

Compared to ‘ for me ‘ list which is likely to be larger ,more universal & easier to define –defining refrains ( things not to do ) is significantly difficult , despite likely to be a shorter list

More important than putting the list together, is our realisation of the need & significance of defining ‘ not for me ‘ list!

What is ‘for me’, has mostly to do with materialistic matters , driven by our desires ; while what is ‘not for me’ is about  inner strength , driven by our values.

The ‘for me’ list has potential to distract and deviate, while the list of ‘not for me’ has power to anchor us.

‘Not for me’ are the reins for our mind horse , which can otherwise get carried away by ‘ what is for me ‘ list .

Therefore , while the ‘for me’ list is fluid and keeps changing endlessly, the list of ‘not for me’ is always compact, consistent, and mostly permanent. It is the list of ‘not for me’ much more than the list of ‘for me’ that defines our character and us.

On a different – spiritual plane , if ‘ letting go ‘ is a part of human evolution journey; we get defined by what we ‘let go’ than what we ‘ let in ‘